Joke on Hotel Maintenance...

Husband : (calls up Hotel Manager from Room) Please Come Fast, I am Having an Argument with My Wife & She Says She will Jump from ur Hotel Window.

Manager : Sir, I am Sorry, But this is ur Personal Issue.

Husband : arre Haramkhor! The Window's not Opening. This is a Maintenance Issue ..

Manager :   

Don't predict the future. Whatever happens, happens for something good

PREGNANT DEER –  a fascinating story! 
In a forest, a pregnant deer is about to give birth.
She finds a remote grass field near a strong-flowing river.
This seems a safe place.
Suddenly labour pains begin.
 
At the same moment, dark clouds gather around above & lightning starts a forest fire. She looks to her left & sees a hunter with his bow extended pointed at her.
To her right, she spots a hungry lion approaching her.
 
What can the pregnant deer do?She is in labour!
 
What will happen?
Will the deer survive?
Will she give birth to a fawn?
Will the fawn survive?
Or will everything be burnt by the forest fire?
Will she perish to the hunters’ arrow?
Will she die a horrible death at the hands of the hungry lion approaching her?
 
She is constrained by the fire on the one side & the flowing river on te other & boxed in by her natural predators.
 
What does she do?
She focuses on giving birth to a new life?
 
The sequence of events that follows are:
 
-         Lightning strikes & blinds the hunter.
-         He releases the arrow which zips past the deer & strikes the hungry lion.
-         It starts to rain heavily, & the forest fire is slowly doused by the rain.
-         The deer gives birth to a healthy fawn.
 
 REFLECTION:

In our life too, there are moments of choice when we are confronted on all sides with negative thoughts and possibilities.

Some thoughts are so powerful that they overcome us & overwhelm us.

May be  we can learn from the deer.
The priority of the deer, in that given moment, was simply to give birth to a baby.

The rest was not in her hands & any action or reaction that changed her focus would have likely resulted in death or disaster.
 

In the midst of any storm, do keep FOCUS, HOPE  and FAITH on God always.
He will never ever disappoint . NEVER.

A Story to Help 'U' STOP Worrying...

The Professor began his class by holding up a glass with some water in it. He held it up for all to see & asked the students “How much do you think this glass weighs?”

.

‘50gms!’….. ‘100gms! …. ‘125gms’… the students answered.

.

“I really don’t know unless I weigh it,” said the professor, “but, my question is:

What would happen if I held it up like this for a few minutes?”…. .
‘Nothing’ …..The students said.

.
‘Ok what would happen if I held it up like this for an hour?’ the professor asked.
‘Your arm would begin to ache’ said one of the students

.
“You’re right, now what would happen if I held it for a day?”
“Your arm could go numb; you might have severe muscle stress & paralysis & have to go to hospital for sure!”
….. Ventured another student & all the students laughed
.
“Very good.
But during all this, did the weight of the glass change?” Asked the professor.
‘No’…. Was the answer.
“Then what caused the arm ache & the muscle stress?”
.
The students were puzzled.
“What should I do now to come out of pain?” asked professor again.
“Put the glass down!” said one of the students
.
“Exactly!” said the professor.
Life’s problems are something like this.
.
Hold it for a few minutes in your head & they seem OK.
Think of them for a long time & they begin to ache.
.
Hold it even longer & they begin to paralyze you. You will not be able to do anything.
.
It’s important to think of the challenges or problems in your life, But EVEN MORE IMPORTANT is to ‘PUT THEM DOWN’ at the end of every day before you go to sleep…

.
That way, you are not stressed, you wake up every day fresh &strong & can handle any issue, any challenge that comes your way!

.

Moral 

So, when you start your day today, Remember friend to ‘PUT THE GLASS DOWN TODAY! ‘

Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength ~ Corrie Ten Boom

Life is short, and it's up to you to make it sweet and it's impossible without change

It was the coldest winter ever. Many animals died because of the cold.

The hedgehogs, realizing the situation, decided to group together to keep warm. This way they covered and protected themselves; but the quills of each one wounded their closest companions.

After awhile, they decided to distance themselves one from the other and they began to die, alone and frozen. So they had to make a choice: either accept the quills of their companions or disappear from the Earth.

Wisely, they decided to go back to being together. They learned to live with the little wounds caused by the close relationship with their companions in order to receive the heat that came from the others. This way they were able to survive.

The best relationship is not the one that brings together perfect people, but when each individual learns to live with the imperfections of others & can admire the other person’s good qualities.


Moral of the story:

“Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.”  George Bernard Shaw 

"Life is short, and it is up to you to make it sweet."  Sadie Delany

Story of Pencil and Eraser

Pencil: I’m sorry.

Eraser: For what?

Pencil: I’m sorry, you get hurt because of me. Whenever I make a mistake, you’re always there to erase it. But as you make my mistakes vanish, you lose a part of yourself and get smaller and smaller each time.

Eraser: That’s true, but I don’t really mind. You see, I was made to do this, I was made to help you whenever you do something wrong, even though one day I know I’ll be gone. I’m actually happy with my job. So please, stop worrying, I will not be happy if I see you sad.

The conversation between pencil and eraser is same as in our life....

“Our Parents are just like the eraser, and we are the pencil. They’re always there for their children, cleaning up their mistakes. Sometimes along the way they get hurt and become smaller (older and eventually pass on).

Take care of your Parents, treat them with kindness and most importantly love them.

Loving someone doesn't need a reason. If u can explain why u love someone, its called 'Like'. If u cannot explain, its simply called 'Love'.

Life is too beautiful, it depends on our way of thinking

Baby mosquito came back after its first flying... His dad asked him, "how do u feel ?"
He replied "it was wonderful daddy... All humans clapped hands for me!! "

Moral:- Life is too beautiful, it depends on our way of thinking, why waste time on what people think..
Keep smiling....☺☺☺

Jokes

After robbing the Bank.

robber 2 clerk: Did u see me robbing?

Clerk: Yes. 

Robber shot him dead & asked the next clerk: Did u? 

2nd clerk: No, But my wife saw u! 


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Boyfrnd rushes home:

Pack ur bag honey, I've won Rs10 crores in a lottery.

GF: Wow!
Thailand or Switzerland?

BF: Who Cares? U jst pack ur bag & GET LOST....


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A guy went for an interview at a big IT company today for the position of 'Computer Hacking Investigator.'

The boss asked him , "So, what makes you suitable for this job?"
"Well," he replied, "I hacked into your computer and invited myself to this interview."

Destiny ...

OneDay..Yamraja came to a Guy and said:

"Hey, today is your last day!"

Guy: "But i'm not ready!".

Yamraja said: "Well today your name is the first on my list...".

Guy:"Okay,then why don't you take a seat and We will drink a COFFEE before we go?"

Yamraja:"All right.. ".

The Guy gave Yamraja some COFFEE with sleeping pills in it.
Yamraja finished COFFEE and fell into a deep sleep!!!

The Guy took the list & removed his name from top of the list and put at the bottom of the list!

When Yamraja woke up he said to the Guy:"Because you have been so nice to me, now I will start my job from the BOTTOM of the list.." !!! Moral:

Whatever is written in your Destiny ...
Will never change... no matter how much u try....

Keep smiling ☺

An Engineer with Inspector...

An engineer went to police station for filing
report for his missing wife:
Engineer : I lost my wife (misty),she went for
shopping and still not reached home yet
Inspector : What is her height ?
Engineer : I never noticed
Inspector : Slim or healthy ?.
Engineer : Not slim can be healthy
Inspector : Colour of eyes ?
Engineer : Never noticed
Inspector : Colour of hair ?
Engineer : Changes according to season
Inspector : What was she wearing?
Engineer : Saree/suit/ I don’t remember exactly
Inspector : Was she going in a car???
Engineer : yes
Inspector : tell me the number,name and color
of the car ? . . . . . .
Engineer : black Audi A8 with supercharged 3.0
litre V6 engine generating 333 horse power teamed with an eight-speed tip tronic
automatic transmission with manual mode. And it has full LED headlights,which use light
emitting diodes for all light functions and has a very thin scratch on the front left door ….and then the engineer started crying….. . . . .
Inspector: Don't worry sir,... . .... ..... .. . . . . .
We will find your car...

Manager....

This is called 'Managers'

Manager: Okay team, today we are going to play a game.

When I say a fruit, you run to the right side of the court.
And when I say a color, you run to the left side of the court. got it?

Team members: Yes, Got it.

Manager: Okay...Ready, Set...
.
.
.
ORANGE!

Team members:............